So I’m thinking of several ways to write this post and I’m not sure how to go about it. But let’s go on and I really hope you’re able to make sense of my ramblings.
I’ve always found it interesting how some people just make monitoring the lives of others their personal business. They know all the young men that drink at the joints and clubs, they know all the ladies that sleep around, they know which husband is beating his wife and they know which wife is cheating on her husband. Amebo central. CNN, BBC, Al Jazeera. You can always trust them to have the “latest” information on who has fallen out of line. They’re good with such stuff.
Another interesting bunch that constantly intrigue me are those that stick their noses up in the air; I better pass my neighbor, I holy pass you, na me pray pass, yet the things they do with their lives in the secret are better imagined than witnessed. These ones judge any and everything, including the fly that feeds on faeces. They would maliciously eye every young lady is a short skirt who is heavily made up but their bland, mary-amaka-skirt wearing daughters are the ones who will get pregnant outside wedlock.
I’m not here to deliver a sermon on the mount. Matter of fact, I’d like for this to be as short as possible.
What a person chooses to do with their life is their business and theirs alone. As long as it’s not adversely affecting you, I don’t see why you should drink panadol on another person’s headache. In fact, drinking panadol is even good. I don’t see why you should develop a high blood pressure over someone else’s headache. Maybe what they are doing could be detrimental to their lives. To that I’ll say, offer advice but only in love. If you adopt the “I’m condemning you straight to hell” approach (which a lot of us do anyways), you’ll end up losing such rather than winning them over and that would amount to developing hypertension over someone’s headache. Undue pressure more often than not results in rebellion and certainly not a change of heart
I don’t judge anyone for any decision they ever made. And here’s my reason. I don’t know what options they were faced with and I certainly cannot say what I would have done if I were to have been in their shoes. And that’s the same story for all of us. Except you are in that exact situation at some point, you will never ever understand. It’s why all these market shoe sellers get on my nerves sometimes. I want to buy a shoe, I try it on, it’s too tight, I tell them and they tell me it isn’t tight. Are you well? Whose leg is in the shoe? Yours or mine?
It’s what we do a lot of times as humans. We tell someone “ no you should not have done that, if I were the one, this is what I would have done.” Right! And you know that because????
My point is pretty simple. Never judge anyone for anything. Never condescend or act more pious than anyone else. You have no idea what they have been through or what they are going through. Life is in phases. Some of us have it easy for the most part, some of us do not. Some of us have help and support in our lowest moments, some of us do not. So for the most part, dey your lane and mind your own business.
Faith gets married in December and puts to bed in May and you’re quickly calculating and running your mouth. “I said it! I said it! She was pregnant before she got married.” So?
She was pregnant but oga married her didn’t he? He did not abandon her or deny responsibility. She did not abort the child. If she had aborted and you heard, your self-righteous tongue would have found her and judged her still.
People make mistakes (well, if the people involved consider it mistakes), generally things happen. Sometimes like we planned for them to, most times, contrary to how we planned but I salute people who are able to move on with their lives after they must have made mistakes. Na them brave pass. Here’s what I suggest, mind your business, lend support whenever you can and each time you feel an urge to judge, suppress it and tell yourself “I don’t know what they have been through.”
So if you go to the Mosque today (Friday), or Sabbath tomorrow (Saturday) or Church on Sunday or none of the aforementioned, remember that people around you are human just like you and they desire to be loved and understood just like you do and for that singular reason, you must not judge.
Let your life be your business and their life their business.
I love you, always.