The Matter

letter to B
So one of my buddies sent this to me and I loved it and decided to share. I hope you enjoy it.
Btw, #RHI returns this week. Forgive my absence. I’ve actually been busy with screenwriting and it’s been a tad difficult, juggling that with my main job and then this blog. Hopefully I’m able to balance it all soon. But I love you guys and I’m mighty glad you’re here. xoxo

Oluchi: How was your day?
Odera: Great
Spent it reading Lee Kuan Yew
Then ate pepper soup with cow leg and some other big meat
Of which I have forgotten the name but not the experience
Oluchi: Ehen?
You are enjoying o…
Odera: As you are not here to talk with
I am knocking myself out on all these poor reflections
Oluchi: Why are you making it look like I’m the only friend you have
You have many other friends now?….
Odera: Or
When I compare you with my other friends
You are still my only friend
Oluchi: Awww…..really Odera….
So you’ve not stopped “whining” ehn?
Odera: If what you are saying is that I have a blessed tongue
Even the angels agree
But actually I need help
Oluchi: Need help with what?
Your tongue?
Odera: Getting the angels to agree with me
Can you help?
Oluchi: Lol
Odera: Please
Oluchi: How?
Odera: Well, it’s a complicated matter
And it’s a personal matter
And as much as I will like to dance with it
It’s a serious matter too.
It’s a confidential matter too
How many adjectives so far?
Let me just continue
It’s a fiery matter, a passionate matter
It’s a decidedly key matter, a matter that excites
It’s a matter of clandestine dealings
It’s a matter of arbitration
In that vein,
I want you to be my lawyer
to the angels
Are you there?
Oluchi: What?
Odera: What is what?
Oluchi: This is too much
Oluchi: I don’t think I can handle this matter o
Odera: The matter
Or the angels?
Oluchi: The matter
Odera: Well it is precisely because of your skill that I am meeting you
Oluchi: 11 adjectives in between. ..
Odera: And it’s not angels
It is 1 angel
So 11 adjectives for 1 angel
Oluchi: Really? Ok. …
Odera: And I’m just getting started
Oluchi: Ehn?
Odera: You know I said it’s a clandestine matter
That is a secret manner
Oluchi: Yes
Odera: Much like the manner of the secret servce
A covert matter
A decidedly non-platonic matter
A matter that Shakespeare considers to be of matter
The type of matter that Romeo will be interested in
Oluchi: Hehehe….ok
Odera: Certainly it’s some matter!
How many adjectives?
Am I still in matter or am I becoming a poet?
Oluchi: 15 altogether
Odera: It’s a matter that bothers on one of your friends
Someone of close matter to you
This is why I need your arbitration
Oluchi: You’re gradually becoming a poet
Odera: That seems to be becoming the matter
Oluchi: Hmmn…..ok
Odera: Do you have an idea of whom I speak off?
Of who I hope will become the crux of my own matter
That will matter when all else will never matter
Perhaps a poorer illustration will be sugar in tea
But I realize that matter is a foregone matter
With no relevance
I will like to say
Odera: That she is my matter particle
Oluchi: Oh my God
Odera: For all intents and purposes her name
Goes by the matter nomenclature
Now we do seem to have a big matter
Oluchi: Hmmn!!!!
Odera: You must allow my oratory a drink of water at this point
Oluchi: That’s serious
Odera: *sips water*
Oluchi: Go ahead
Odera: Do you advise I get another?
Oluchi: If you want
Odera: Well the Atlantic Ocean is finished
I’ll hate for someone to hold me responsible for that matter
When a bigger matter is on my hand
So my lawyer
Oluchi: Yes
Odera: Do you fancy my chances in this matter?
Oluchi: I don’t know actually
Why didn’t you go straight to the point?
Odera: Well
I know you will never see matter again as a simple word
Its Britain’s fault
Oluchi: Lol
Odera: They used the word as a noun and a verb
Oluchi: But wasn’t it stressful
Odera: Well
No matter
In form of any word
Can aptly describe this matter
In simple words
Hence the oratory
Oluchi: Hmmn….deep
Odera: It even caught your attention
If I had come straight
The matter would have been lost before it mattered
But first
Are you on my side with this?
Oluchi: So that’s the reason why you started chatting with me ehn?
Oluchi: I’m on your side
Odera: Let me explain how it happened
Oluchi: Why won’t I be?
Odera: As Gbemi was listing people that had access to Tamara
She called your name
And I was like
So Oluchi is in this galaxy?
*mouth open*
All our old Oluchi moments just came back
I couldn’t help myself
My fingers started typing your name
Even when I was sleeping
Can you imagine?!
See how I missed you
Oluchi: That’s not true
Odera: Ok
I was not sleeping
But sleepy
The rest are true
Ask Gbemi
Oluchi: If you really missed me you would have said Hi at least once in the past
Odera: Just came on WhatsApp a week ago
Oluchi: Anyway. …back to the matter
Odera: Serious
Oya my bad
Oluchi: Do you talk to Maureen?
Odera: I’m sorry
We are not that close
Like that
To bring up Tamara
Oluchi: I understand
Odera: How do we go in?
Oluchi: Do you want me to talk to her?
Odera: Yep
Help me lay the carpet so I can come in
Oluchi: Ok …I will do that
Odera: Thanks Oluchi
Odera: This means a lot to me
Oluchi: Hehehe
You’re welcome
It’s quite obvious
Odera: What is obvious?
Oluchi: That it means a lot to you
Odera: Lol
Let’s just say you are making a long term investment
And we will forever honor your effort
Oluchi: Oooo…
Odera: Lol
Smiles for Oluchi

Thank you for reading. Meanwhile, the blog is gonna be two years old on Thursday. I’ve been thinking of ways to celebrate and reward some of my most dedicated readers. Any ideas? I’d love to hear from you. Have a fabulous week.

Image credit: Google images

11 thoughts on “The Matter

  1. Omo….this is a serious matter o anywyas, isnt love a serious matter enough?? Congrats, oge…thank God for ur blog……ehn ehn, back to d matter…pls conclude dis series for us…as celebration


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