For Seun Odukoya; Not all Superheroes Wear Capes


I have written about you so many times. I have spoken about you till I’m blue in the face. Anyone who knows me has had their ears filled with my tales of your awesomeness. But somehow, all these don’t even feel enough. How do I thank you enough for all that you do? How do I let you know just how much I appreciate you? How do I express gratitude for your unwavering loyalty and your consistent love?

Dearest Seun Odukoya, I have been privileged to have so many rainbows colour my life and you are one of the distinct ones. In the last 4 years, we have gone from Twitter followers to _______ friends, to boss and PA and now to an extension of each other. You are a part of me. It doesn’t feel like you’re another person. It just feels like you are an extended part of me.

There was a season in my life in that was fraught with lows and blues and most days were a struggle. But like the cape-less hero that you are, you showed up every single time, sharing love, light and bringing pure delight to my heart. I remember a particular day I went offline for a great many hours without any notice. After calling my phone unsuccessfully through the night, you left your home at 5am to try and find my house in Surulere, even though you’d only been there once with me at night. I’ll never forget that act of kindness. Ever. You earned the title of my real MVP then J

You’ve never let me feel like I a bother. Even in times where 9 out of 10 of my phone calls to you were to whine or rant or just be a baby, you remained rock solid and never let me feel small for being vulnerable. I am super, super thankful for you and I can never say this enough. You are one reason why I feel like I can do anything. Because I have seen you defy life and its attendant madness to chase your dreams. You have set your own manual and you live on your own terms and it is so lovely to see you set goals for yourself and pursue them relentlessly, even when it gets hard. I am so darn proud of you. Have I never told you before? Well, I am SO DARN PROUD OF YOU!!

You’re one of 2 men in my life, not related to me by blood that I would take a bullet for in the blink of an eye, without as much as a second thought. You have earned that spot with your kindness and your love. You go hard for me. From encouraging me to face my fears to holding my hands when I’m down to cheering me on in my victories… You my precious are one of the most amazing gifts I have received in my lifetime.

Thank you for doing life with me, thank you for the access you have given me, thank you for being a part of me and thank you for redefining friendship on a pure, wholesome level. I tell you all the time, they don’t make them like you no more. And that’s okay. One Seun Odukoya is enough to last me an entire lifetime. Because of you, I have learned to value every single one of my relationships on their own merit. I have learned that dreams are valid and that last last, even if things don’t work out as I want, I can always count on you to share a cocktail with me and laugh at pain or failure in the face.

I love you Seun. I am thankful for you. You’re a total rockstar. You’re my Superhero. And it’s a privilege to build greatness with you.

Cheers to the New Year. Kick ass!



My Bucket List of 25

Hi guyssssssss!!

Hope everyone had a good weekend.

Well, mine was great. I woke up this morning and my blog was 5. It’s amazing. Can’t believe I’ve been doing this for 5 years already. Anyways, to ‘celebrate’ it, I decided to share this bucket list with you guys, written earlier in the year. I know I haven’t been consistent here *face palm* but I’m working on it, I promise.

In the meantime, I hope you’re enjoying Milli’s Oceans Apart. Many thanks to the people who have been supporting her with their shares and comments. You guys are rockstars! Writing really isn’t easy so every form of feedback is a major encouragement.

So here’s my list of 25. Good luck to me achieving them. I have already crossed a few off anyways so I’m quite positive. I’ll keep updating it as I go along.

  1. Visit 30 countries before I turn 30 (7 done so far. Good start, no?)
  2. Have a weekend getaway to some island where I will wear a straw hat and sip on mojitos and play in the sand by day then write soppy love stories by night. (Okay, maybe not soppy love stories. But sha write)
  3. Publish a novel. (One to start with at least. Lol!)
  4. Ride behind someone on a power bike (My heart won’t let me be the rider biko.)
  5. Work with some of the leading filmmakers in Nigeria.
  6. Own a filmmaking company.
  7. Visit Rome! DONE!! And it was sooooo beautiful!
  8. Visit the Egyptian pyramids
  9. Visit Brazil
  10. Learn to speak fluent French (something more than oui oui, vous vous)
  11. See Tye Tribbett live in concert
  12. See Yanni live in concert
  13. Read the Bible completely from Genesis to Revelation. (Can’t believe I haven’t done this yet. *Facepalm*)
  14. Learn to play the acoustic guitar.
  15. Climb a mountain
  16. Fly in a private jet.
  17. Go on a boat cruise. (Sorta kinda done. I had dinner on a boat cruise for my birthday. I think that counts, no?)
  18. Work with an international organization preferably in the field of dispute resolution.
  19. Go sky diving
  20. Learn a martial art.
  21. Learn to make afang soup (those who know, know).
  22. Learn to swim. (Right now, I can only move in water small. Lol. I’d love to learn to actually swim.)
  23. Feature in a movie. Not any serious acting. Just show face and give my Macleans advert smile.
  24. Give a Ted Talk.
  25. Visit all the African countries.

So that’s me done.

Many thanks to everyone who has been here through the journey. It has been super exciting for me but only possible because of you guys who read, share, comment or even do waka pass. Y’all are the real MVPs! Thank youuuuuuuu

And because I’ve got itchy fingers this morning that might probably last a few days, I’d ask this. If you guys have any themes or ideas for a story you’d like me to write. Whether short story or series, please share in the comment section and your wish will be my command. Have a super Monday!

Loads of love and light!


My Woman, My Amazon ❤️❤️❤️

Whenever I have to talk about my mum, there’s the problem of where to start. And once I start, there’s the problem of when to stop. But that’s only because she is such a strong, warm, amazing and inspiring person. 

The kindness and hospitality of her heart is enough to write a book on. And it is this same kindness and hospitality that I have imbibed and vowed to keep upholding till I take my final breath. 

I remember my mum always hosting guests while we grew up. My dad’s friends loved our house. Especially when they had to come to Zaria for a course. Mum would make her legendary pounded yam and Egusi or vegetable soup and then pepper soup and they would eat to their heart’s content. 

Mum’s hospitality is why I’m nearly always hosting friends 😂😂😂. It’s like a spirit. The spirit of Mrs. Nwobia’s hospitality is strong with me 😂😂😂

My mother meets you first with her heart before anything else. And a good number of my friends can testify to having met her heart even before her face. My mum gives like her life depends on it. And sometimes I don’t understand it. But then I read Eph 2:10 and it makes sense. 

Mum gives to people she hasn’t even met, just as long as there’s a legitimate need and it’s in her capacity to give. She isn’t the wealthiest person in finances but her heart, the wealth of her heart is overwhelming. 

It’s her birthday today and I can’t help but think and thank God for the endless gift that she is. For the numerous selfless sacrifices she has made, for every single time she has come through, for all the many lessons she has taught me (esp the secret to her destiny trapping stew. Lol.) 

For her amazing sense of humour that leaves me laughing each time we have a phone conversation. For her compassion, for her faith, for her hope even in the most awful situations. 

My Proverbs 31 woman. My woman, my amazon, my friend. 

Find you a mother who believes in the validity of your dreams twice as much as you do. 

Find you a mother who helps mend your broken heart by recommending and paying for your travel. 

Find you a mother who loves your friends and mothers them just as much as she does you. 

Find you a mother who will spare no expense to make your dreams come true. 

Find you a mother who does not give up on you even when you have given up on yourself. 

Find you a mother who celebrates even the tiniest of your victories like it was the birth of the messiah. 

Find you a mother who is president of your cheerleading squad. 

Find you who is constantly thinking of you and buying you big and little gifts just because. 

Find you a mother who is selfless in her love, just like Jesus. 

Find you a mother who is a perfect role model for wifehood and motherhood. 

Find you a Mummy Nwobia. 

This one is already taken. 

But because there’s love in sharing, you’re welcome to share. 

Happy Birthday Mama Mia! J’adore ❤️❤️❤️

Dear Kess…


Dear Kess,

I still remember your wide smile and cute pink gums. I remember your curly hair. I remember your skinny frame which was so much like mine back then. You should see me now though. I’m a size 10! My memory of your voice isn’t as strong as it was 7 years ago. But no matter how faint it becomes, I doubt I’ll ever forget it. Because that voice spoke some of the kindest words I ever heard to me. I doubt I’ll forget the sound of your laughter either. It wasn’t loud but it was infectious.

At different times each year, something brings you to memory. 2 years ago, it was a conversation with bestie and no matter how hard I tried, that conversation hurt my heart. It hurt so much that I soaked my pillow with tears later that night. She said you kept telling her you were tired and no matter how she tried to encourage you to fight, you wouldn’t stop insisting that you were tired and wanted to say goodbye. A part of me hurts that you wouldn’t fight for longer, but a part of me demands that I be reasonable because you were in pain I cannot even begin to fathom.

I remember talking to you about a certain crush who told me to go outside and play with sand. This was in SS2 I believe. And you were so kind and warm to me with your words that his own rude words soon lost their sting. You were there to listen to me rant about even the most inconsequential things. We shared an intense love for literature and the arts as a whole. And now I can’t believe you’ll never get to read my blog or watch any of my movies. Kess, I have made you proud with my writing and you aren’t even here to see.

I’m writing this today because Timehop brought back a tweet I shared 2 years ago after that conversation that night with bestie. 7 years after your departure, I still hurt that I didn’t have enough time with you. I hurt for that call to you that I kept postponing. I hurt for one final call, one last goodbye that never happened.

When we last saw 8 years ago, you teased me and said “so you went to Covenant University and forgot all of us abi?” I laughed and promised to do better, to stay in touch. 7 years later, I can’t believe how woefully I failed to keep that promise.

A few months ago, I made a promise to myself concerning someone but in the last few days, I have been breaking that promise without any deep thought to it. But this is a reminder. No more broken promises. I will do right by my heart because as much as is possible, I don’t want to hurt the way I am hurting.

Where my failed promise to you is concerned, I may hurt, but I certainly have no regrets. Because for a season of my life, I was blessed to share time and space with a truly precious gem- you. I am thankful for all that we had. I am thankful for the memories I have, no matter how faint.

I will never forget your smile, I will never forget your heart and I will never forget your essence.

Sleep well my friend.

Happy New Year, Ogechi!

This is what happens when you have friends who think the world of you and ascribe the highest value to you.
This moved me to tears and I am so honoured and overwhelmed by this. I am wealthy in relationships and I do not take that wealth for granted.
Thank you!

Seun Odukoya

How you dey?

So because plenty of us have so much to say, ‘somebody’ decided to do this…

Me, I am just watching from the sidelines, hella proud to know someone like you.

Happy New Year, dear.


            A Public Holiday signifies a “day off” for “everyone” but not “everyone” observes the spirit of the holiday, because to some it is nothing more than a “day off” work. So Christians celebrate Easter while Muslims enjoy a “day off” and in the same way Muslims celebrate Salah and Christians enjoy the free time. Of course there is an exchange of ram and chicken here and there but all public holidays are in essence “privatized” based on the reason for the season.

We the “FRIENDS OF YOUGEE” (FOY from hereon) declare April 18th today and for all ages to…

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25 Shades of Awesome


I woke up this morning and I was 25. It’s such an amazing feeling. And I’ll be honest, 2, 3 years ago, I didn’t imagine I would feel this great on my 25th. I thought I would feel apprehension or fear because life was happening too fast or because I hadn’t hit certain landmarks personally but this feeling that I have this morning- it’s anything but negative vibes.

The last few months leading up to today have been great for me. I have found inner peace, contentment and rest on every side. So when I woke up this morning, I had nothing but gratitude for the life that I have, for the numerous people that colour it and for the 25 different shades of amazing that it has been. I can honestly say right now, in this moment, that I have EVERYTHING I want and need and my contentment derives from that.

So because 25th birthday, I’d like to share with you my precious readers, 25 random things about me. Enjoy!

  1. I have such a high energy level, I’ve had people question me about drug usage before because they couldn’t fathom the source of my never ending ginger. It’s not drugs I promise, it’s something in my blood. Lol!
  2. I love dancing. If you didn’t know this, then we probably aren’t friends. Because all my friends have at some point or the other been embarrassed when I suddenly break into a dance in the middle of a street to music playing only in my head. Hehe.
  3. I don’t like jollof rice. I honestly don’t get the hype so I rarely ever cook it. Can count on one hand the number of times I have cooked it in my life and will likely not run out of fingers.
  4. I love travelling. One time I changed my last name on Twitter to Ajala. Hehe. Always in the mood for an adventure.
  5. I love writing so much but I fear that if I had to do it mechanically for a long time that I would get tired of it.
  6. When I do the same thing over and over for a really long time, I get bored and restless. For something to hold my attention for a long time, it must have some dynamic elements.
  7. I can’t work a 9-5 for too long. Again with the restlessness. If I am in the same role or carrying out the same tasks for too long, my mind shuts down of its own accord. But I refuse to see this as a ‘bad’ thing sha. I guess it’s just what it is.
  8. My ideal job would involve a lot of travelling, writing, public speaking and dispute resolution.
  9. My friends are my greatest wealth and I am privileged to have a great deal of them. They always come through and that is why I am so effusive anytime a close one has a birthday.
  10. I’m allergic to honey. This was a weird discovery but honey makes me sick sometimes so I avoid taking it. Still don’t understand how or why that happens.
  11. I have a weird ‘condition’ with my knee. Still haven’t been able to figure it out but sometimes, the knee just twists and gives way and I fall then it twists right back to its normal position. It could happen while I am sitting, standing, walking, running or even lying in bed. The freakiest thing ever. It’s why I gave up athletics on a competitive level. Who knows, I would have probably been at the last Olympics. LOL. But it’s been happening since I was a kid and I have chosen to not let it get in the way of my other high energy activities. And that brings me to my next point.
  12. I am a huge fitness fan. Dancing, running, working out, lifting weights, anything to break a sweat, you name it and I’m in.
  13. My biggest fear is losing the ones I love the most. It’s why I serenade them all the time. Whether publicly or privately. I let them know just how much they mean to me so if I were to ever lose them, I would not have any regrets.
  14. Flowing from that, I have absolutely no regrets in life. If I could go back in time, there is absolutely nothing I would change about my choices. Even the seemingly bad ones have led me to this- a woman I am so proud of. So yeah, no regrets.
  15. My finger nails have two layers. It’s so weird. I don’t even bite my nails. But I peel them sometimes and it’s a little weird to look at. Don’t ask me to show you my nails if we meet. It’s a little embarrassing and I’m trying to keep them as normal as possible.
  16. My faith is the singular most important thing to me. I have walked a few rough roads and I have shared a few blazing furnaces with friends and loved ones. The only reason we came through solidly was because of faith. So it is the singular most important thing to me.
  17. I am firm believer in capacity building. Push yourself, grab every opportunity you get to grow and do not despise any task assigned to you.
  18. My basic motto for life- learn, grow, build capacity, maintain relevance.
  19. Leadership to me simply means service so the few times I have been privileged to lead, it was more a call to service and I wish our leaders shared the same sentiments.
  20. I love long walks. Walks in the park, walks by the beach. Walks anywhere. I’ve been called a professional trekker before. Lol.
  21. I love handwritten letters. It’s the fastest way to my heart.
  22. I love surprises! Getting random, unexpected gifts, a random burst of serenading, surprise visits surprise parties, etc. As long as it’s something unusual and unexpected, you have won my heart.
  23. I don’t know how to whistle a tune. This makes me sad, but I don’t know how to. Each time I purse my lips and try, it never comes out right. The sounds I make are actually laughable.
  24. I love, love, love dogs! Especially puppies. They are sooooo cute!
  25. I love hard and I am such a romantic. Happy is the man who gets to wife me. Hehe.

I just turned 25 and it is abso-freaking awesome!!!


Sunset at Noon: Peace Like a Fountain


Dearest Kay,

I miss you. I really do. But it’s no longer a nagging ache in my heart. I think that somehow I have finally made my peace with your passing regardless of all I may have said last year and the year before that. I don’t even know how that happened. I just know that I no longer feel anger or resentment at your absence. Certainly not the anger and resentment and deep hurt that littered the first post I wrote about your death and how our sun set at noon.

But it’s not even just about you. Kess, Ribadu, Bukky; all the young friends I have lost. Somehow peace has come to me and I am thankful for that.

The listlessness and fatigue that usually threaten to drown me in the month of March have been replaced instead with a peace I can’t even begin to describe or explain. Interestingly, I don’t even feel guilty for that peace. I think that holding on to the fatigue in some weird way made me feel like I was still connected to you, because no matter how many years go by, I never want to forget you. I never want you to be a distant memory. I never want to have to dig too deep into the dredges of my memory to find your mischievous smile or the glint in your eyes. It’s been 3 years now and the sound of your laughter has begun to fade in my ears but I earnestly hope I never completely forget it. It’s why I write these every year, to ensure that I never forget.

I went through your Facebook pictures today. Didn’t hurt like I thought it would. I was smiling the entire time and you were smiling back in most of them with those your chubby cheeks I would have loved to pull. I do miss you Kay!

March last year was really rough but this year is better. Never mind that I lost an aunt about a week ago. But I have found strength and peace and I can’t emphasize that enough. I’m wearing a smile as I write this. Maybe because I remember what my dear friend said to me when I went crying to him last year. “Death comes to us all, just make the most of the time you have with those who are still living.” I’m doing my best to make the most of all my relationships and I will not stop consciously investing in them.

Indeed to live in the hearts of those who love you is not to die. So I am thankful that you still live in my heart- you and every other person who has left me on this side of eternity. Spring is here, the flowers are blooming and I have peace flowing like a fountain on my insides.

Forever loving you,