2018 Review: Slow Down Baby, You’re Moving too Fast

Since I began reviewing my year in 2014, this has been the ‘hardest’ to write. Or should I say, this has been the laziest I have been to write. That’s probably because my 2018 can best be described as a slow year, a passive year even and for someone who is always about one activity or the other and constantly on the lookout for the next best thing, I didn’t quite know how to handle it. The year is winding down now and I only just getting to accept that this slow pace is okay. It’s the only way I can keep my sanity. I mean, considering how the last few years have been for me, it was as though life was saying to me “slow down baby, you’re moving too fast.”

I keep saying “slow” because the only thing I seemed to ‘accomplish’ this year was finishing Law School and getting called to the Nigerian bar. Which in itself doesn’t feel like an accomplishment, but ho knows, maybe in reading through my journal, I will find high points I may have missed.

I participated in two gratitude challenges towards the end of this year and it shocked me how hard it was to find reasons to be thankful on some days. And this is how I know 2018 was really not that ‘great’ a year. Oh well, as is my custom, I will do a monthly review and end with my goals for 2019.

January

The year began on a sober note. I had to do some personal assessment and I realized I was really not as infallible as I thought. LOL. And this is coming from someone who should know better. Humble pie isn’t the sweetest to eat but I think it is the healthiest. So there was that.

Attended Bestie’s brother’s wedding in the East and had a blast. But not without some close brushes with annoying local men that really had me moving mad. Your average uneducated Nigerian man is toxic and the disrespect towards women, totally unrivalled.

I returned to Lagos and settled into school work again. Hung out with close friends and was grateful for feedback that mostly everyone was doing well and winning all round. Amidst the tumult of the month, one key thing stood out:

Everyone needs a superhero once in a while.”

February

The month started out with me struggling and feeling overwhelmed with school work. But my parents were incredible anchors that kept me from drowning. It was also Shekinah’s birthday, one of the most amazing men I know and that turned out to be the perfect excuse to take a break from school work and let my hair down for a bit.

I’m reading through the rest of my journal entries and to be honest, I struggled quite a bit this month. There were times when I was just about ready to give up on myself even but Mercy said no. My friends came through though. There were beach hangouts and lovely dinners and willing shoulders to cry on plus ice cream and warm bear hugs without an iota of judgement.

The Lenten Season began and I resigned myself to a month of waiting on God and building spiritual capacity. An important prayer I prayed this month: “In my moments of uncertainty, Father let my hope in You be strong enough to make me wait on You. Let my heart rest sure and easy in You.”

We have an anchor that keeps the soul, steadfast and sure while the billows roll, fastened to the rock which cannot move, grounded firm and deep in the Savior’s love.”

March

Started out on a high note with close friends pushing hard and showing up for me back to back. I was genuinely overwhelmed with love. Bubu completed his ATC course and the pride in my shoulders ehn!! All the shoulders pads in the world would not have sufficed. Didimma got engaged and I thought my heart would burst for all the love and joy that filled it.

I got a medical diagnosis and my faith took a major hit. I think the problem was largely how the doctor broke the news of the diagnosis to me, almost like it was some sort of death sentence. (I don’t have a terminal illness, so don’t worry. Lol.) The rest of the month was an endless cycle of a cocktail of emotions- frustration, faith, sadness, hurt, hope, worry, peace. Etc. But I had the support of loved ones and family and that helped a great deal.

I fasted and prayed and cried to God like I have never done before and well, I ended March with my faith and peace intact.

Even the strongest people have personal crises they deal with. Check up on all your ‘strong’ friends.”

April

The term ended for Law School and oh the joy that filled my soul. A great deal of the mental stress I was undergoing was a direct effect of being in that system and boy was I glad to take a break.

I find that April is generally always a good month, perhaps because it’s my birth month. But the first best thing to happen this month was Eloho’s wedding. The way my heart was sweeting me all the way to Benin ehn, you would think it was my wedding! For all the love and warmth Eloho brings to my life and the lives of others around her, it was a huge privilege and blessing to be able to share in her moment. Eloho, God bless you and uncle C. I love you both immensely!

Next was my birthday. I wasn’t particularly excited for this year’s because there was a lot about my life that I didn’t quite have figured out. But my birthday came and I was surrounded by loved ones who threw me a surprise pre-birthday dinner (that had me knocking and punching some people for their deceit in a bid to pull it off. Lol) and subsequently enjoyed a small, quiet dinner on the birthday itself. My heart was warm and full.

Two of my favourite humans returned home from Europe and we had the absolute best time!! I had not seen either of them in months (that felt like years) so we did our best to make up for lost time. Hangouts at the mall, late nights out and loooooooooong conversations. LOL. I had the best time really. Oh, my court attachment was this month too. It was interesting to observe how the Nigerian justice system works.

No one really has their life all figured out. Las las, we are all winging this thing. Relax, you’ll be alright.”

May

Started out with the birthdays of bestie, my twinnie and the younger brother. Back to back turn ups. Lol. I had made two applications in previous months towards the advancement of my career that fell through. The rejections didn’t sting that bad, oddly, I just kept it moving. What did manage to get me down though was the realization I was still uncertain how to tie in all my major interests in order to move forward with my ambitions after law school. Let’s just say this was something I would worry about often for the rest of the year. I began actively studying for the bar final exams.

Was on a radio show where I talked about my writing. Had a lot of fun with that. A random conversation with a friend inspired new travel plans for the year. Reviewed my adulting skills and realized I sucked at some parts of it. But that’s life, innit? As stated clearly in my journal- “See, abeg, mi ole wa ku”

Which one of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?”

June

We welcomed my niece- Chimdiuto Munachimso. I unlocked a new level of love I could never have imagined existed. Chambers attachment was just there. More exam preparations. Raced to Zaria during the public holidays and spent the entire time glued to my niece’s cot. Enjoyed the World Cup matches and all the banter that came along with the games.

My trip up north brought a lot of nostalgia and unearthed long forgotten, buried memories. But my gratitude remained for a beautiful history that is past while I look with hope to an amazing future that is to come.

More progress with exam prep. Messed up an application for another career move and missed the deadline and I was so frustrated, I cried. It looked like the universe was conspiring to not give me anything I wanted along the lines of career advancement. Sigh. We move still.

 “Everything good will come, you just need faith and a great deal of patience.”

July

July began with the nastiest waves of panic attacks to ever hit me in a very long time and I was worried, very worried by the trigger. July was hard. The exams were upon me and I was dealing with stresses from multiple angles that I was not mentally equipped or prepared to handle. I didn’t die though and at the end of the month, with the MCQ part of the bar finals behind me, I was grateful to be standing.

Nothing is worth sacrificing your mental health and peace for. Absolutely nothing.”

August

The much anticipated bar finals exams came and I was thankful for the ease with which I wrote the exams. The pressure had been insane, I had done all I could to prepare and once the exams were done, I took a much needed and well deserved holiday to Ghana and Cote D’Ivoire with my bestie. We met up some other friends and had the best time exploring. I wrote about those trips here and here.

Times and seasons will come and go. Nothing lasts forever.”

September

I went back to Zaria for Muna’s dedication and resumed full time nanny duties. Lol. Shout out to mothers all over the world. Y’all are the real MVPs. I know how many times I wanted to pull out my hair because of Muna. LOL. And yet, every single time she smiled at me, I thought my heart would burst with love. My phone is filled with so many pictures of her ehn! Eish!

I started my fitfam journey this month. The thick life was really not for me. Lol, okay, maybe some parts of it but the chubby cheeks, Christian mother arms and bulging belly had to go. Plus I really couldn’t reconcile getting so close to a size 14 from a size 8. So yeah, the movement began and it was hardddd. We welcomed my goddaughter this month and my heart that was practically bursting with love expanded some more for the lil munchkin.

When your friends and loved ones win, you win too.”

October

Another month babysitting and watching Muna grow. Remarkable I tell you. More on the fitfam journey. I battled unforgiveness this month. I didn’t even realise I was still holding on strongly to something that had happened years ago. But I think I eventually found a way to let it go.

Results came out this month and I passed the bar. All my friends passed too but my excitement was largely for Dolapo who made it through despite the insane bricks life hurled at her throughout the Law School period. You’re still my hero darling! Shout out to you!!!

This month mostly felt slow and uneventful and there were lows but we found a way to keep it moving.

Even time needs time. This too shall pass”

November

November was practically more fitfam and more babysitting. The call to bar ceremony was this month and yours truly was officially a confirmed lawyer. I wasn’t over the moon with excitement. Lol. I dunno why. I guess I was bored by the fact that it was done and trying to figure out the next big thing. But the parents were very proud and hosted a small dinner reception in my honour.

Constantly find reasons to be thankful even when you don’t feel like.”

December

I returned to Lagos after 3 months of being away. Queen came home for Didimma’s wedding and we all had a blast. It was the first time us 3 were getting together again in over 2 years.

Made new friends at the wedding and generally had a grand time.

Travelled to the East for the holidays and it’s been nice.

December had a few lows but summarily taught me another level of contentment. I feel like every year, there are deeper levels to contentment that I unlock and this year rang so true. I learned that contentment is not merely a state of mind but a way of life. True contentment is expressed not just by the words we speak but by the actions we compel ourselves to take. It is rebelling against the natural order of things- consumerism, selfishness.  True contentment is in reminding yourself that what you have is enough and shutting down avenues that make you covetous of what belongs to others.

So I guess it wasn’t totally a bad year altogether. Not the best year yet but not so bad either. I am hopeful for 2019 though. Already making moves for the year even and my goals are simple and clear:

  1. Build capacity in my field. Take courses, attend conferences, put out those applications, and gather experience.
  2. Drop down to and maintain a size 8. 65-68kg plis dear.
  3. Travel some more. Would 4 countries be too ambitious? Well that’s the goal. Throw in a bit of local travel as well. New cities are always a great idea.
  4. Publish my ebook(s). (I can imagine some of my close friends rolling their eyes at this because they know how long this has been coming. But hold me accountable and I promise I won’t disappoint).
  5. Give back. Volunteer with Charities/NGOs.
  6. Live my best life basically.

How would you summarize your year? Share with me in the comments please. And let’s hear your goals, dreams and aspirations for 2019.

I pray the New Year is good to you. I hope you live your best life in 2019 and I hope you find all round contentment. Happy New Year guys!

Ps. If there was one thing you could do in 2019, what would that be?

 

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Updates and a New Category

Hi guys! It’s been quite a while since I was consistent on the blog and I have thoroughly missed it. But in between the madness that was Law School, I have had so many random thoughts and ideas that I penned down, waiting for the right time to flesh them all out and I am so glad that I finally have a moment.

If you know me, you would know I have a lot of interests and the last few years of my life have been about me zoning in on one of those interests and nurturing it passionately to a point where I can confidently balance it with other interests and not feel like I am drowning. I think I have come to that point but time will tell.

Err, what’s new? A Blog series is underway. I started writing it sometime in 2014 and it started coming together nicely between 2017 and 2018. I have a few episodes down and I already love the characters. Fingers crossed you’ll love them too. I would start sharing immediately but my laptop gave up the ghost last week and pending its resurrection and my putting down a few more episodes, I will be unable to share. So pray for a miracle guys! Something new is coming your way and I’m positive you’ll enjoy it.

I’ve got some short stories coming anyways. The beautiful thing about short stories is I don’t necessarily need my old laptop for inspiration. The notes on my phone plus random things around me will be inspiration enough, so I’ve got you guys covered. Stay tuned!

What else is new? Travel Thursday! Yay!! Again, if you know me, you’ll know I am a travel enthusiast. I love visiting new places but I hardly ever share about them. Actually, one of the items on my bucket list is to visit 30 countries before I turn 30. I have 10 under my belt so far and I have decided to start sharing stories from my travels in a new category on my blog that I have titled Travel Diaries. I have been meaning to write travel stories for the longest time but I have always held back for a multitude of reasons. But in the ever famous words of my cousin, “no more!”

Thanks to encouragement and support from my soul sisters Chidimma and Queen (they’ve earned this shoutout), I have resolved to share my travel stories; the good, the weird and the downright hilarious. The stories will be shared every Thursday and I really do hope you enjoy them and find a bit of inspiration as well.

That’s about it I guess. Summary, Oge_writes is back to telling stories and is assuring you of at least one new post every week. So help me God. Enjoy the rest of your week folks and see you Thursday with our first travel post. Who can hazard a guess of the city or country?

2017 In which I Lived My Best Life Yet

I remember exactly where this picture was taken, when it was taken and exactly how I felt in that moment. It was the eve of my 25th birthday. I was sitting on a ledge overlooking the River Seine in Paris and there was a wellspring of happiness and perfect contentment, bubbling from deep within my heart and overflowing well over on the outside.

In so many ways, 2017 has been my year and if you have followed my reviews since 2014, you will agree with me. 2017 was the year in which I lived my best life, maintained my authenticity and deliberately chose to be happy.

At the end of my 2016 review, I came up with a relatively simple plan for 2017.

  • Live vivaciously but make responsible choices.
  • Read a lot more.
  • Travel some more. My goal is to visit at least 4 new countries. A girl can dream no?
  • Throw fear out the window and choose love, peace and happiness.

And as the sun sets on 2017, my heart is bubbling over with joy and contentment because I lived out my simple plan for 2017. And I will share that journey, as usual, with a breakdown of each month.

January

2017 began on a really high note for me. I was in the US with cousins I hadn’t seen in over a decade and as the turnup Queen/Minister of enjoyment that I am, we were moving across cities and lighting the entire place up. The first couple of weeks in January were super LIT!!!

I returned to Scotland in the middle of the month and my body broke down from excess enjoyment. Lol. But there was the amazing Bridget to nurse me back to health.

February

February was good to me. My mooting partner and I won the semi-finals of the Main faculty mooting competition for my Law School and I was really excited and equally nervous for the finals. I was mostly buried in school work in February and then I had moments of doubt with one of life’s numerous choices. Look, fear is such a killer. We must learn always, always to replace our fear with faith. It’s really hard but it’s well worth it.

March

Mooting finals came and we won! It was surely the best way to start the month! The result of this win was that my name would go up in the “hall of fame” at the Law School library as one of the winners of the 2017 main faculty moot. I was super pumped.

I lost an essay competition I’d entered into but this didn’t dampen my mood at all. I had a lot going for me and I was super content. School work was a bit intense but I powered through. I lost an aunt this month and it hit me hard.

On the up side, I began making active plans towards my travel goals for the year and that had me excited for the most of March. I also realized I’d put on some ridiculous weight and it was time to hit the gym again. Being thick is attractive to some people but I wasn’t sure it was for me. Heh.

On a whole, March was really, really good to me. Especially the 8th of March 🙂

April

The best month. Always the best month!!

It began with a lot of pressure with school work. Then my Schengen visa came through and mans got on a plane to go see the city of Paris for Spring break.

See ehn, find you some good friends. Honestly, find you some really good friends who think the world of you. Because the month of April for me was made perfect by some of the best friends anyone could ever ask for. I spent two weeks of the Easter holidays in Paris touring, laughing and living my best life without a single care in the world. I had people who ascribed the highest level of  value to me go out of their way to prove their love for me in kind words and dinner on a boat cruise for my 25th birthday. I still can’t get over it. I shed so many happy tears that day (yes, I bring on the waterworks pretty easy. Sue me.) My birthdays have progressively gotten better through the years and this 25th one legit took the cake.

Of course I had to embarrass my friends by turning cartwheels randomly in the middle of the streets of Orleans. That’s my trademark. Constant unruliness.

April was really, really good to me. I laughed, a whole lot, I smiled till my cheeks hurt and for every single day of the month, my heart was full.

May

Final exams. I’d been preparing through the semester and when they came, I felt really ready. And after the exams came the groove. Next to April, May was another awesome month. I hit my travel goals when I went on a Euro tour with my cousins. From London to Rome to Barcelona to Paris and then Frankfurt. I hit my target of 4 new countries this year and it was really exciting. Travelling opens your mind in more ways than you could ever imagine and I was so glad I could do it.

Rome was warm and welcoming. I definitely want to go again sometime. Barcelona was mehh at first but then we took a hike up the Montjuic castle and the view was so rewarding plus the salsa with gorgeous, waist-winding Latino men? Yes please!!!!!!

I’d been to Paris before but we checked out new sights together and Frankfurt was more like a quiet getaway- a time to rest from all the travelling.

Best believe I stamped my signature unruliness across Europe though, cartwheeling at St Peter’s Basilica, dancing randomly at malls, train stations and on the streets. Lol. So, so extra this one. The Lord be with the man that chooses to wife me.

May was really, really good to me.

June

The month began with depression. It was as though my enemies reckoned I’d been having too much of a good year and they had to get me. I failed one of my courses. Ok not fail like I had to rewrite it, but I scored a D which is as good as a fail in my books. And that totally unexpected grade knocked the wind out of my sails. That should have been one of the easiest courses, I had worked so hard and it made no sense at all. But Abba had a lesson coming.

Anyways, I spent the weekend with my phone off, crying and just totally out of it. But Eloho came to my rescue and so did Mr. N. I know both of you will read this- bless your hearts for being such incredible gifts to me. And bless your heart too dear Bridget! I can’t imagine how unbearable it must have been, living with me for those 3 days but you are such a gem.

Guys, find you some really good friends that will move mountains for you. ‘nuff said.

Ah, I was saying Abba had a lesson coming. Almost 3 weeks after the results came out, I showed up at my graduation not exactly excited. Another degree in the bag. No big deal. Well, until I received my certificate and saw that I’d made a Distinction. See, when you will and run and Abba decides to show you mercy, it is such a beautiful sight to behold. I wept happy tears (Yes, again with the waterworks. Sue me na). Hard work for all the 2 years had paid off. Baby girl had an LLB with Distinction.

Definitely my favourite grad picture 😁

And then the day after, I got on a flight and moved back home to Nigeria.

July

The first leg of Law School resumed in Bwari. I got frustrated by the registration process that took 6 hours but still wouldn’t finish. (If only I knew what would happen in Lagos a few months later. LOL.)

There’s something about coming from a system that works down to a place where inefficiency is the order of the day. I still can’t wrap my head around it. And no amount of mental preparation was enough to equip me for the madness.

But in the midst of all the chaos, I met good people, made new friends and tried my best to settle into life in Nigeria. For whatever it is worth, this is home.

August

Ah. August was a really good month filled with lots of love, laughter and wide and wild smiles. Law school was still on but there were so many good vibes coming my way that I didn’t feel any pressure. I also did more reading this month and that left me feeling happy.

September

Snuck into Lagos for small weekend getaway and I totally had a blast. September started on a really good note for me and that long weekend away from the stress of school was so needed.

I read Trevor Noah’s ‘Born a Crime’ and it was brilliant. Totally my book of the year.

Wrote Bar 1 exams which were pretty ok. Just like that, 3 months of Bar 1 had flown by and that phase was over. At the end of the month, I moved back to Lagos, supposed city after my heart. El Oh El.

October

Food poisoning had me admitted at the hospital with drips and injections being pumped into my system for a whole day. Was quite a horrid way to start the month, but I bounced back. Commuting around Lagos was super stressful, I lowkey began to contemplate my supposed love for the city. Fam, Lagos is stressful. (Note to Mr. N; if you remind me about that blogpost on falling in love with Lagos again ehn…)

October was a good month, save for the stress of commuting. I met up with a lot of old friends I hadn’t seen in years and made a couple of new ones too. Of course you know by now that I am people person. Relationships and human interactions in general excite me.

November

Hehehehe. Bar 2 of the Nigerian Law School resumed in Lagos and I spent one full week doing registration. I almost went mental! To think that I’d complained about 6 hours in Abuja months before, only to come and do one full week in Lagos. I am tired of Nigeria abeg. Send help.

Classes began and they were every bit as intense as I’d been warned they would be. But then again I am Oge, the poster kid for workaholism so I fell into step after a couple of weeks.

Then I had the opportunity to do something really amazing for a short gig and it worked out so well. I was super happy and proud.

December

This month has been a fine mix of everything. I had a meltdown after struggling with power issues in school. It wasn’t just the power to be honest. So many things about being back in Nigeria had been chipping at me over the last 6 months. “Death by a thousand cuts” a friend called it. And so it was that I found myself in my room on a Sunday morning wailing buckets and nearly cussing myself out for moving back to Nigeria. Brethren, send help.

I made it through the remainder of school and fled to the comfort of my mother’s arms the moment we got a break; after my body reacted violently to the stress it had endured of course. And then I came home to super amazing news such that all the suffering I’d endured so far suddenly became inconsequential. Abba remains super faithful.

My 2017 is nearly at its end and I am so grateful for all that the year has been for me because just like I set out to do this year;

  1. I lived vivaciously as you could tell from the numerous trademarks of my unruliness across different cities.
  2. I read a lot more books than I have in the last 3 or 4 years put together. 12 in total. Hopefully more next year if Law School will let me see road.
  3. I travelled a lot. 5 new countries this year even more than the 4 I originally set out to achieve. So proud of myself and so thankful too.
  4. I threw fear out the window and chose love, although to be fair, sometimes it did feel like fear was hanging on the window sill mocking me and daring me to shut it out completely. I still have some work to do in that department. As for peace and happiness, those pretty much sum up the entirety of my year.

My writing suffered this year. I didn’t write any series for the blog even though I had a couple I was working on. School pressure never let me make enough progress to begin sharing and I certainly did not want to start and leave you guys hanging. If you read Damage Control, you’ll understand. But I did some screenplays and I’ll be happy to share when production is finally complete. The blog grew to over 100,000 hits this year. Thank you guys for sticking around. I will make up for this season. Best believe.

For 2018, I plan to keep it even simpler- Stay authentic and keep living my best life.

It’s the parents’ wedding anniversary today. 3 decades and then some. May 2018 for you be as fresh and flourishing as the love I see them openly display for each other. It is the absolute cutest thing.

Love, Light and Positive Vibes!

@Oge_writes

For Seun Odukoya; Not all Superheroes Wear Capes

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I have written about you so many times. I have spoken about you till I’m blue in the face. Anyone who knows me has had their ears filled with my tales of your awesomeness. But somehow, all these don’t even feel enough. How do I thank you enough for all that you do? How do I let you know just how much I appreciate you? How do I express gratitude for your unwavering loyalty and your consistent love?

Dearest Seun Odukoya, I have been privileged to have so many rainbows colour my life and you are one of the distinct ones. In the last 4 years, we have gone from Twitter followers to _______ friends, to boss and PA and now to an extension of each other. You are a part of me. It doesn’t feel like you’re another person. It just feels like you are an extended part of me.

There was a season in my life in that was fraught with lows and blues and most days were a struggle. But like the cape-less hero that you are, you showed up every single time, sharing love, light and bringing pure delight to my heart. I remember a particular day I went offline for a great many hours without any notice. After calling my phone unsuccessfully through the night, you left your home at 5am to try and find my house in Surulere, even though you’d only been there once with me at night. I’ll never forget that act of kindness. Ever. You earned the title of my real MVP then J

You’ve never let me feel like I a bother. Even in times where 9 out of 10 of my phone calls to you were to whine or rant or just be a baby, you remained rock solid and never let me feel small for being vulnerable. I am super, super thankful for you and I can never say this enough. You are one reason why I feel like I can do anything. Because I have seen you defy life and its attendant madness to chase your dreams. You have set your own manual and you live on your own terms and it is so lovely to see you set goals for yourself and pursue them relentlessly, even when it gets hard. I am so darn proud of you. Have I never told you before? Well, I am SO DARN PROUD OF YOU!!

You’re one of 2 men in my life, not related to me by blood that I would take a bullet for in the blink of an eye, without as much as a second thought. You have earned that spot with your kindness and your love. You go hard for me. From encouraging me to face my fears to holding my hands when I’m down to cheering me on in my victories… You my precious are one of the most amazing gifts I have received in my lifetime.

Thank you for doing life with me, thank you for the access you have given me, thank you for being a part of me and thank you for redefining friendship on a pure, wholesome level. I tell you all the time, they don’t make them like you no more. And that’s okay. One Seun Odukoya is enough to last me an entire lifetime. Because of you, I have learned to value every single one of my relationships on their own merit. I have learned that dreams are valid and that last last, even if things don’t work out as I want, I can always count on you to share a cocktail with me and laugh at pain or failure in the face.

I love you Seun. I am thankful for you. You’re a total rockstar. You’re my Superhero. And it’s a privilege to build greatness with you.

Cheers to the New Year. Kick ass!

Oge.

My Bucket List of 25


Hi guyssssssss!!

Hope everyone had a good weekend.

Well, mine was great. I woke up this morning and my blog was 5. It’s amazing. Can’t believe I’ve been doing this for 5 years already. Anyways, to ‘celebrate’ it, I decided to share this bucket list with you guys, written earlier in the year. I know I haven’t been consistent here *face palm* but I’m working on it, I promise.

In the meantime, I hope you’re enjoying Milli’s Oceans Apart. Many thanks to the people who have been supporting her with their shares and comments. You guys are rockstars! Writing really isn’t easy so every form of feedback is a major encouragement.

So here’s my list of 25. Good luck to me achieving them. I have already crossed a few off anyways so I’m quite positive. I’ll keep updating it as I go along.

  1. Visit 30 countries before I turn 30 (7 done so far. Good start, no?)
  2. Have a weekend getaway to some island where I will wear a straw hat and sip on mojitos and play in the sand by day then write soppy love stories by night. (Okay, maybe not soppy love stories. But sha write)
  3. Publish a novel. (One to start with at least. Lol!)
  4. Ride behind someone on a power bike (My heart won’t let me be the rider biko.)
  5. Work with some of the leading filmmakers in Nigeria.
  6. Own a filmmaking company.
  7. Visit Rome! DONE!! And it was sooooo beautiful!
  8. Visit the Egyptian pyramids
  9. Visit Brazil
  10. Learn to speak fluent French (something more than oui oui, vous vous)
  11. See Tye Tribbett live in concert
  12. See Yanni live in concert
  13. Read the Bible completely from Genesis to Revelation. (Can’t believe I haven’t done this yet. *Facepalm*)
  14. Learn to play the acoustic guitar.
  15. Climb a mountain
  16. Fly in a private jet.
  17. Go on a boat cruise. (Sorta kinda done. I had dinner on a boat cruise for my birthday. I think that counts, no?)
  18. Work with an international organization preferably in the field of dispute resolution.
  19. Go sky diving
  20. Learn a martial art.
  21. Learn to make afang soup (those who know, know).
  22. Learn to swim. (Right now, I can only move in water small. Lol. I’d love to learn to actually swim.)
  23. Feature in a movie. Not any serious acting. Just show face and give my Macleans advert smile.
  24. Give a Ted Talk.
  25. Visit all the African countries.

So that’s me done.

Many thanks to everyone who has been here through the journey. It has been super exciting for me but only possible because of you guys who read, share, comment or even do waka pass. Y’all are the real MVPs! Thank youuuuuuuu

And because I’ve got itchy fingers this morning that might probably last a few days, I’d ask this. If you guys have any themes or ideas for a story you’d like me to write. Whether short story or series, please share in the comment section and your wish will be my command. Have a super Monday!

Loads of love and light!

@Oge_writes

My Woman, My Amazon ❤️❤️❤️


Whenever I have to talk about my mum, there’s the problem of where to start. And once I start, there’s the problem of when to stop. But that’s only because she is such a strong, warm, amazing and inspiring person. 

The kindness and hospitality of her heart is enough to write a book on. And it is this same kindness and hospitality that I have imbibed and vowed to keep upholding till I take my final breath. 

I remember my mum always hosting guests while we grew up. My dad’s friends loved our house. Especially when they had to come to Zaria for a course. Mum would make her legendary pounded yam and Egusi or vegetable soup and then pepper soup and they would eat to their heart’s content. 

Mum’s hospitality is why I’m nearly always hosting friends 😂😂😂. It’s like a spirit. The spirit of Mrs. Nwobia’s hospitality is strong with me 😂😂😂

My mother meets you first with her heart before anything else. And a good number of my friends can testify to having met her heart even before her face. My mum gives like her life depends on it. And sometimes I don’t understand it. But then I read Eph 2:10 and it makes sense. 

Mum gives to people she hasn’t even met, just as long as there’s a legitimate need and it’s in her capacity to give. She isn’t the wealthiest person in finances but her heart, the wealth of her heart is overwhelming. 

It’s her birthday today and I can’t help but think and thank God for the endless gift that she is. For the numerous selfless sacrifices she has made, for every single time she has come through, for all the many lessons she has taught me (esp the secret to her destiny trapping stew. Lol.) 

For her amazing sense of humour that leaves me laughing each time we have a phone conversation. For her compassion, for her faith, for her hope even in the most awful situations. 

My Proverbs 31 woman. My woman, my amazon, my friend. 


Find you a mother who believes in the validity of your dreams twice as much as you do. 

Find you a mother who helps mend your broken heart by recommending and paying for your travel. 

Find you a mother who loves your friends and mothers them just as much as she does you. 

Find you a mother who will spare no expense to make your dreams come true. 

Find you a mother who does not give up on you even when you have given up on yourself. 

Find you a mother who celebrates even the tiniest of your victories like it was the birth of the messiah. 

Find you a mother who is president of your cheerleading squad. 

Find you who is constantly thinking of you and buying you big and little gifts just because. 

Find you a mother who is selfless in her love, just like Jesus. 

Find you a mother who is a perfect role model for wifehood and motherhood. 

Find you a Mummy Nwobia. 


This one is already taken. 

But because there’s love in sharing, you’re welcome to share. 

Happy Birthday Mama Mia! J’adore ❤️❤️❤️

Dear Kess…

sunset

Dear Kess,

I still remember your wide smile and cute pink gums. I remember your curly hair. I remember your skinny frame which was so much like mine back then. You should see me now though. I’m a size 10! My memory of your voice isn’t as strong as it was 7 years ago. But no matter how faint it becomes, I doubt I’ll ever forget it. Because that voice spoke some of the kindest words I ever heard to me. I doubt I’ll forget the sound of your laughter either. It wasn’t loud but it was infectious.

At different times each year, something brings you to memory. 2 years ago, it was a conversation with bestie and no matter how hard I tried, that conversation hurt my heart. It hurt so much that I soaked my pillow with tears later that night. She said you kept telling her you were tired and no matter how she tried to encourage you to fight, you wouldn’t stop insisting that you were tired and wanted to say goodbye. A part of me hurts that you wouldn’t fight for longer, but a part of me demands that I be reasonable because you were in pain I cannot even begin to fathom.

I remember talking to you about a certain crush who told me to go outside and play with sand. This was in SS2 I believe. And you were so kind and warm to me with your words that his own rude words soon lost their sting. You were there to listen to me rant about even the most inconsequential things. We shared an intense love for literature and the arts as a whole. And now I can’t believe you’ll never get to read my blog or watch any of my movies. Kess, I have made you proud with my writing and you aren’t even here to see.

I’m writing this today because Timehop brought back a tweet I shared 2 years ago after that conversation that night with bestie. 7 years after your departure, I still hurt that I didn’t have enough time with you. I hurt for that call to you that I kept postponing. I hurt for one final call, one last goodbye that never happened.

When we last saw 8 years ago, you teased me and said “so you went to Covenant University and forgot all of us abi?” I laughed and promised to do better, to stay in touch. 7 years later, I can’t believe how woefully I failed to keep that promise.

A few months ago, I made a promise to myself concerning someone but in the last few days, I have been breaking that promise without any deep thought to it. But this is a reminder. No more broken promises. I will do right by my heart because as much as is possible, I don’t want to hurt the way I am hurting.

Where my failed promise to you is concerned, I may hurt, but I certainly have no regrets. Because for a season of my life, I was blessed to share time and space with a truly precious gem- you. I am thankful for all that we had. I am thankful for the memories I have, no matter how faint.

I will never forget your smile, I will never forget your heart and I will never forget your essence.

Sleep well my friend.